FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
