I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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