Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
