You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
