i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
