I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
