it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I wish they made helmets for livers.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
