new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
