What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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