im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Drunk is not a location!
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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