smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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