Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Randomize
