Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
