I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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