Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
