I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
