Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize
