Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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