I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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