My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
