Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
