i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
