Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
