Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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