I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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