Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
