We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
