i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
this will be a night to untag.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
