I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
