Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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