awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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