I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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