we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize