You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
