I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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