you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
