Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
