; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
My nipple is on Facebook.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
