she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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