Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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