If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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