just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Randomize