we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
