I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Quick, to the slutcave!
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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