I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
