I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
All I want is dick and wine.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
