just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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