i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
