David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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