Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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